Today at lunch I spent it with Alex. It wasn’t intentional. He just saw me and decided to hang out with me for the rest of the time being. It’s really nice talking to him. He told me how he wants to leave high school already. He can’t stand most people at our school. Alex told me he doesn’t go to school to make friends, but to get his education. He only wants to keep in contact with a couple people and he told me I’m one of them. Alex is my only ex that isn’t awkward when we talk about our past. People are surprised we even went out. He told me when we go on our different paths, I better keep my head straight and not mess up my future. I told him the same and we’ll keep in touch. I’m glad we’re good friends. We can open up to each other and talk about our past and present. He’s a good guy and its nice to have him around.
Depend on no one. No one, no matter how much they promise you, will ever be there for you whenever you need. People change. People grow. People grow apart.
I can’t wait for someone to love me as much as I love them. Maybe more. I can’t wait to see that and feel that love grow instead of diminish. I want the effort to still be there even after four, ten, fifteen+ months. I can’t wait until I finally get who I deserve and who deserves me just the same.